Shiggy, Does My Ass Look Fat?

Mr. Miyamoto,
You are a genius and because of your imagination and hard work, you kept me out of trouble and in my den while I was a kid. Armed with my NES Max, I destroyed the creatures of Hyrule and saved the princess several times. Hell, I even played on the power pad about 6 times. You gave me hours of entertainment that I cannot thank you enough for (either can my parents).
However, you also did a couple of things to me that were not so good. I did not get laid until I found the one that most looked like Princess Peach and my ass is fat. Yes, I am blaming you because you are a scapegoat and you will never read this (either will anyone else). I now have the tools to become a healthier nerd and of course, you created them.
I tried Wii Fit for the first time last night and I am a bit sore. The goal is to stick with it and make this work. Mya from Yourself Fitness was doing a good job for awhile, but she was not making it fun.
There is an army of overweight men and women in their late twenties to late thirties that have you and your cronies to thank for the extra cushion for the pushin', and now you have to bring us back from the brink so we can by more of your games in the future.
Shiggy, you have your work cut out for you.

-rc